home

we are home from kansas.  3 trips back and forth in 2 weeks makes me one very tired girl. 

to "anonymous": yes, i did change out of the shorts for the bible study :). i put on jeans and a intramural t-shirt from college, haha.

i took one whole picture of heather's wedding saturday.  my friend, jen, took over 2,000, so i will share more when she sends me some!  love yall.

p.s. james and i got home today just in time to see the end of the chiefs' and packers' games.  blah.  hopefully both teams will make the playoffs!!!

p.p.s. maybe i should wear makeup more often.  i look a whole lot better with it...

on dressing up

last night as james and i were walking out the door to our weekly small group bible study, james asked if i was going to change out of my running shorts.  i replied that no, i actually changed into them for the study and he asked if i would at least put on jeans (he had on jeans and a polo). before you think my husband is some kind of controlling dress snob, let me give you a little background...

after james and i had been dating for about a month, we had a "state of the union" relationship talk.  we shared our biggest joys of dating and biggest fears.  i kid you not--james' biggest fear was "that i would make him wear too many polos and dress up all the time."  if you knew my husband growing up, you would understand his fear as he lives in t-shirts and basketball shorts.  and the reputation he heard about me was that i complained my boyfriends did not wear enough polos (ha!).  it was that day that i knew if that was his biggest fear, we could work through our issues and build something good.

james and i both love wearing workout clothes/sweats/running shorts.  a sweaty guy in gym clothes turns me on so much more than a guy in a polo.  not that i hate polos (because actually i do like james and other guys in them), but anyone can put on a polo, and polos send a message that "i'm trying to look good" (especially at a dave matthews concert, haha).  on the other hand, a guy in workout clothes says "i'm not trying to impress, i'm living and taking care of myself (and i'm probably decently athletic)."

growing up, i wore t-shirts all.the.time.  especially at sporting events, i absolutely HATED it when girls dressed up.  a blue, tight dress does not convey jayhawk spirit like a good ole' fashioned t-shirt.  then i went to john brown and i became that girl.  i'm not sure if it was because all of my friends dressed up, i liked the attention/was trying to find a husband, or we had nothing better to do (probably all of the above), but i dressed up for basketball games.  (i would like to share that post-college, i stopped.  when i go to arkansas games, i always wear t-shirts).

working out at camp war eagle really helped me go back to my roots.  one of my friends came to visit and wore a cute sundress, and i wanted to ask her why she wanted to draw the attention to herself as the only person out there not in shorts and a t-shirt.  even if her primary motivation wasn't attention but maybe "to feel beautiful," they are virtually the same thing in my eyes.

i think high heels are the biggest attention seeker.  and yet, i still own heels and wear them from time to time, so what does that mean?  actually, i have some pink shoes that average about 5 compliments a day when i wear them (hahaha yes i keep track because they are my only pair like that) and i constantly struggle with why i wear such things.  is fashion asking for attention or is it to display beauty (and is either good)?  is our goal to draw attention to our shoes or attire or to focus on the heart?  how does dressing up in heels or wearing makeup fit into professionalism vs. seeking attention vs. enjoying life?

last year i read the book, "captivating," with some of my girlfriends and we discussed many of these points.  however, i don't think my heart fully settled on the issue and i still question whether the pursuit of any type of beauty is positive/holy/profitable.  as much as i tell myself no, i'm still going spray tanning tomorrow and buying fake nails for a wedding saturday.  yet, i haven't worn mascara for the past 2 weeks (or much in the past 2 years for that sake) and i can't convince myself that getting regular manicures or pedicures is a good use of the money God's provided.  i am very comfortable without makeup, but often i question if i am too comfortable and should wear it more.  and that concludes random thoughts from silvy on this lovely october night...love yall.

love ya, grandpa

my grandfather passed away last week.  even though he was 88, it was semi-unexpected and very tough for our family.  james, parker and i drove to lawrence on monday and spent the whole week with my dad and relatives.  i learned many new things about my grandpa including that he led a team of mechanical engineers to perfect the process for coating m&m's (3,300 pounds an hour in the 1950's!) and that he received several patents for his incredible creations on other research projects.  he was a loving father and grandfather who deeply cared about his family.  he was generous, selfless and humble.  he had a strong work ethic and spent many hours working on the family farm (which motivated him to earn his degree from KU). 
here is a link to his obiturary: http://www2.ljworld.com/obituaries/2010/sep/29/carl-perkins-jr/

i love the photo my aunt submitted from his pilot days in the army (WWII):

i am really glad my grandpa got to meet parker.  even though he only had 1 grandson (out of 8 grandkids), he has 4 great-grandsons (out of 5!)

james, parks, dad, sister, fiance and me after the funeral.  dad changed out of his suit before i could snap a photo.  our family hates dressing up :)

some of our family at my dad's house.  it was nice to be able to spend time with everyone.

here we are at a ku football game a few years ago.  love this pic!

i love you, grandpa, and your presence will be deeply missed at all of our family gatherings!!!

health insurance

by no means is this any sort of political post, but i would like to praise my company for a minute for providing excellent health insurance.  it seems like all we hear are people complaining about how terribly expensive healthcare is and no one is grateful.  even the millions of people in our country who get free health insurance are not grateful (okay i really promise this is not going to be a political post, but james' experiences as an emt and at the hospital are sometimes frustrating to hear).  anyway, today i salute you, hr of our company, for doing a fine job helping our employees have affordable insurance. 

even though our deductible is fairly high, our work sets aside a geneourous HRA fund every year.  this money rolls over if not used in its entirety and is funded solely by our employer.  james and i used this money to pay for most of  parker's birth expenses and it was a huge blessing.

also, our work rewards people for making healthy lifestyle choices.  this is something i am very adamant about and am thankful for as well.  in two weeks, our office will undergo a voluntary "screening" that tests cholesterol, blood sugar, bmi/waistline, blood pressure and asks if we are tobacco-users.  depending on the scores, we receive a monthly discount for living a healthly lifestyle.  it does not hurt the people who are unhealthy, but rewards those who are not as likely to be a big financial health expense to the company.  granted there are factors and situations that make it more difficult than others to achieve certain bmi levels or whatnot, but overall, i think there is such a lack of personal responsibility for being healthy and it is encouraging to see rewards for valuing health.

i weigh more than i want to right now.  my bmi is probably higher than i want it to be (i haven't had it tested for a while).  yet there is no one but myself to blame for my current situation.  sometimes i tell myself that if i didn't have a kid i would still be in the same shape i was 3 years ago (and i more than likely would as i love to workout), but at the same time, several of my neighbors go running every morning at 6am and if i was really motivated to lose the 13 pounds i've added since we got married, i would get up early to run.  here's to hoping the screening still goes well... :).  love yall.

weddings can be fun

i still have a few denver posts in the queue that are a little outdated now (zoo, estes park, firefighters museum, etc.), but tonight i'll share a couple pictures from my friend jinger's wedding.  james and i truly had a great time at this event.  we didn't know a ton of people, but the wedding had 3 key elements that always make a wedding more enjoyable for guests:

1. kid friendly...or kids were invited.  (for the first time at a wedding, parker made friends and danced on the dance floor for a good 2 hours!!  it was such a blessing.  he also kept going around stealing steak knives off the table before dinner and running around with them but that is a whole 'nother story [no one was hurt]). 

2. dancing

3. alcohol/dinner

we've been to so many weddings lately that have not had any of these luxuries and we just did not enjoy ourselves.  i know weddings are all about the bride and groom, but i really appreciate the weddings where people put the guests' enjoyment in the priority list as well.  besides the fact that we have to entertain parker in the hallway during all wedding ceremonies, receptions without food or dance floors are not really kid friendly either and p is at the age where he does not want to sit still. 

anyway, the next two upcoming weddings should be fun...heather's wedding will be a fun lawrence/high school reunion, and courtney's wedding will have all of the above mentioned amenities.

below are two of my best friends from my internship who were so kind to come to james' and my wedding in kansas two years ago:

happy lil' family.  love that james and parker match!

yay for a renewed faith in the happiness of weddings and a positive attitude going forward...love yall!