Wednesday, January 6, 2010

on date night

i know i'm in the minority on this one, but i think date night is overrated. every relationship is different, but neither james nor i are into solo dates v. much. don't get me wrong--quality time & communication are essential for marital success, but date nights? nah. we love spending time with friends, and having people over for dinner gives us the same high that date nights do for other people. even before we had parker, we rarely went on one-on-one dates. now they are even more rare and that is perfectly okay with us.

reasons why date night is overrated (for us):
1. we are extremely cheap frugal. paying $10 an hour (or whatever the going rate is)? plus dinner & a movie? no thank you!
2. neither of our families are within 4 hours. see number 1. (our families are very willing to watch parker when they come to visit and we are thankful).
3. it is exhausting to prep parker for time at someone else's house...pack his diaper bag, explain feeding & sleeping schedules, bring a pack & play, etc.
4. it is hard not to think about parker and wonder how he is doing while we are out. actually i don't really worry about him that much, but knowing he is sweetly sleeping at our house brings a feeling of peace.
5. it is easier to keep parker's routine consistent when we are watching him.
6. parker goes to bed around 7:30 or 8:00 every night and that leaves 2+ hrs of quality time every night.
7. we try to make a point to turn off the tv and computers after parker goes to bed (at least for a little while) to spend time together. the other night james lit a bunch of candles in our room and gave me an awesome massage, and i loved that (free) night much more than an expensive night on the town.
8. i have to dress up for work every day. when i come home, i just want to put on sweats and relax.

anyway, here are a couple fun dates we've gone on in the last few months...

razorback football game! my mom was in town, my neighbor gave us tickets for $1 and my sis and bro-in-law to be came along! go hogs!

my birthday! we had a coupon for ruth chris' and enjoyed the treat! (the place was packed on a thursday people really frequent this place in this recession? i couldn't believe it! must be expensable or something)delish!we might have to make this an annual event!out to eat after james' fire school graduation. his parents took us and parker!and then i dyed my hair brown, ha. david and sarah's wedding! great food and open bar, whattttt? so much fun!work christmas party. free food and drinks again!razorback basketball game. went with james' friend who had free tickets (and sat in j.b. hunt's wife's box! free drinks again!)hope everyone has a lovely night!!! the high tomorrow is 8 degrees here, eek! windchill -20 thursday. definitely not taking parker to a babysitter's house in this weather! :) love yall.

p.s. GO JAYHAWKS!!!! way to sneak one out tonight--you had me worried!


Katie said...

Ooo, I love date nights!! We have a cash budget and have money set aside for them, since it is a priority to us, which keeps us on track. But, I totally agree with you with the family thing--one of the main reasons we can go on them is because my husband's parents live here!! It would be a different story if they didn't live here, especially with the overnight thing. But, I say that as long as you are doing something to spend intentional one-on-one time together at some point during the week, whether at home or across town, you're doing the right thing!

I love your pics!! You look awesome and I love your darker hair!!

Diet DP Loving Mom said...

I'm with Katie on this one. I love date night. We have a great sitter who comes to our home so B's schedule is consistent. Thankfully we both work from home so we get a lot of one on one time throughout the week, and we have one "date lunch" a week. We only use her about once a month if that, normally it's for a wedding, so I guess that's not really date night. But I see what you mean, I don't miss it as much as I thought I would. But I do love going out every once in a while with Hubby on my arm.

kristina said...

silvy, i totally agree. i love spending time with rhys, and i treasure the few hours we get every night after eleri goes to bed. but we love having people over and going to the local pub or rugby club as a family. i would much rather spend our time and money on somethign else rather than a set date night. when we move to arkansas we should all get together :)

A Wedding Story said...

Ya'll are so cute! Date nights are fun but are very expensive too!